Week 13 Day 1

Week 13 Day 1

Meditation object choiceless

Intention resisting craving to look at the clock! Noting nodding and other sensations!

Evening all! 10 mins metta and 30 mins noting. I set an interval timer so I wasn't always peeking. I want to start doing a slightly longer practice. For today's metta I had a picture of my niece up on my ipad to remind me when I lost focus. I did feel that I focused for longer than usual. Need to review the fixed concentration practice.

Noting today was noddy and yawny. It really is the first time I sit still after the day. My nodding is very quick though I snap out of it quickly. I basically go blank and stop feeling my breathing. Last week I listened to a Nick vid that was about intention. the advanced intention he suggested was ...notice the different layers of conceptual processing that are overlaid on or follow immediately after each physical sensation...

Umm well I don't actually know what conceptual processing is, so like a good old geek I googled it. And hey guess what there is no easy definition, I think it is a neuroscience term. However, I read one of Nick's comments on a 7DMK post and I think I understand. The woman was explaining that her breathing was like a blah blah blah...and Nick said, why dont you try to observe the raw sensations rather that trying to conceptualise them. Aha so my aperture closing and opening is like a conceptual layer over the raw sensation of breathing...hmmm Anyhoo so I should just observe the actual sensation and not try to make it into a whatsitflapping over the thingammyjig.

I also noted that one cannot prevent yawning! This is an involuntary activity, even if you do try to you can only stifle it. I had my eyes open most of the time but I was still nodding. I did though feel entirely at ease and very content. I definitely wanted to stay the entire planned time, and it was not that I felt that I wanted it to end, but I was tired.

Golf today was a bit grim, i played around 12 holes before coming off the course during a down pour. Still even if the weather is cold and rainy, being outside on the course gives me great pleasure and the fresh air is a necessary fix for my 5 days in the office.

Dad is still the same, no progress. The doc didn't do a round today, hopefully we'll hear more tomorrow. I sent him a text because I couldnt get through to him by phone and Mum said that he had received it.

Ok..this week's agenda is not too busy...but who knows I've just remember that my boss is off in a week, so that is not a very relishing thought. It means I will have to stand in for him. No rest for the wicked.

I've passed the 12 week mark. When does something become a habit? 6 weeks, 10 weeks, 6 months? Hope it will still be as enjoyable in another 12 weeks!